Originally Posted 5.19.2010 “losing my shit..”

this morning is ridiculously difficult for me…i have my headphones on at work so no one bothers me..tears on welled up inside my eyes..my heart feels insanely heavy..it dawned on me this morning, that for the rest of my life i will be on medication..everyday..(i am grateful for this medication of course)
this morning i stood in my kitchen and took 6 pills..the same 6 pills that i have to take every single morning. log the time into a spread sheet, then go about my day..
and today, the first day is so hard i just want to curl up with ange in bed and cry..have him rub my head like he does..put me to sleep so i don’t have to think right now..
but i can’t..i am at work..and i have to go to another scan later today (which i elected to do of my brain)..so that has enough weight to it to cause my tears..
so much to process..

(reply to this | Edit | Delete)
by Michelle Tolpa at Wednesday, May 19, 2010, 1:25 PM

I love u.

(reply to this | Edit | Delete)
by MaryAnn Merendino at Thursday, May 20, 2010, 4:29 PM

Love you Jennifer.

(reply to this | Edit | Delete)
by Aimee Merendino at Friday, May 21, 2010, 8:17 PM

Thinking of you and wondering how you are… I have to say that ever since I read Katie’s comment, I can’t help but think of you with wings in combat boots…you really are quite groovy. Love you. xoxo

(reply to this | Edit | Delete)
by Cindy Moorhead at Friday, May 21, 2010, 9:55 PM

dear, jen
so sorry all that you have to go through. gosh, cancer is so unfair! this is my first visit here, and i had a chance to read almost all your posts. i’m in awe of your strength, your perseverance,
your patience and your undeniably kickass attitude. thinking of you.

(reply to this | Edit | Delete)
by Colleen Dangerfield at Saturday, May 22, 2010, 11:50 AM

i love you my bunny rabbit.
your lean bean. xoxo

This entry was posted in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s