this morning is ridiculously difficult for me…i have my headphones on at work so no one bothers me..tears on welled up inside my eyes..my heart feels insanely heavy..it dawned on me this morning, that for the rest of my life i will be on medication..everyday..(i am grateful for this medication of course)
this morning i stood in my kitchen and took 6 pills..the same 6 pills that i have to take every single morning. log the time into a spread sheet, then go about my day..
and today, the first day is so hard i just want to curl up with ange in bed and cry..have him rub my head like he does..put me to sleep so i don’t have to think right now..
but i can’t..i am at work..and i have to go to another scan later today (which i elected to do of my brain)..so that has enough weight to it to cause my tears..
so much to process..
by Cindy Moorhead at Friday, May 21, 2010, 9:55 PM
so sorry all that you have to go through. gosh, cancer is so unfair! this is my first visit here, and i had a chance to read almost all your posts. i’m in awe of your strength, your perseverance,
your patience and your undeniably kickass attitude. thinking of you.