Origianlly Posted 3.29.2008 “ugh”

 will be having 4 months of chemo starting april 18th..
the first session of drugs will be every other friday..for 4 sessions ( 2 months) via IV..for an hour and a half..my hair will fall out within 3 weeks.(im going to get all of my hair cut off this week, because i won’t be able to handle seeing it fall out)…and this is the one that may make me nauseus..but they will try and reverse that with a drug..then the second drug..is the same and will follow immediately..same thing..every other friday..(2 months)but this one i have to sit for 3 hours..so they said expect to be there half a day..then i will get 2 to 4 weeks off..followed by 6 weeks of radiation..once that is done.. i will start hormone therapy for 5 years..and these drugs will put me in a post menopausal state..so i will not be able to even think about babies until after..
1 thing at a time.and that of course was incrediably upsetting to angelo and i..but we are doing everything we need to in order to be as strong as possible..i already started the hormones for my egg retrieval..which should be done..end of this coming week or beginning of next..i have a billion doctors appts coming up…and still am generally not in the mood to talk on the phone..so please don’t be upset if i don’t answer the phone..i am getting my messages..and love all of them..thank you so much for all of the positive thoughts, flowers, cards, and love…and please keep the good amazing loving thoughts my way…and please know that i feel very lucky to have all of you in my life..

Projections (reply to this | Edit | Delete)
by Ann Merendino at Saturday, March 29, 2008, 9:28 AM

I don’t know if this helps or not–my teacher friend has been doing what you will do–recently finished her chemo and is in the radiation stage. She’s my hero and I expect you will be too. She talks about it like it is. The best thing is she was diagnosed at the beginning of the school year and we all spoke hopefully to her that by the end of this school year she would be done and healthy. Guess what? There’s only about two more months of school! She looks good and her spirit is amazing. What a journey and what an example she has set for me others around her. My goal was to help you project–in about 7 or 8 months(?) you too will be strong and healthy! We all can’t wait and are praying for you along your journey. My best to you and Angelo! Love, Ann

P.S. Thanks for the opportunity to let you both know all that has been going through my mind and heart since we first heard.


deep breath…. (reply to this | Edit | Delete)
by Dianna Kamp at Saturday, March 29, 2008, 2:18 PM

As usual I can’t find words except both Bob and I love you very much…
I was looking for a great quote…instead I found this website from a woman named Heather (www.especiallyheather.com) who is going through cancer… a husband and family that adores her – she has a lot in common with you…. I found an entry in her blog dated 3/21/08 and it hit home….she is addressing her cancer…
You are a shadow in my heart, whispering in my ear. “I am still here”.
and quietly I whisper back “Not for long”
That whisper is getting louder and louder day by day, moment by moment.
And sometime, soon I hope, it will drown out your voice.
PS – my mom had me at 42 years old…..she waited a long time for me to come along (she had 5 miscarriages before me)….according to her she wouldn’t change a thing 🙂

hello dear friend (reply to this | Edit | Delete)
by MaryAnn Merendino at Sunday, March 30, 2008, 12:46 PM

Hi Jen, I must tell you, I’m out of sorts being in my own home, I should be in yours. Allan and I will check out your July calendar so that we can schedule our visit. Meanwhile, the past few days were wonderful, I am so lucky to have you and Ange in my life. Thank you for all you did and shared; my nails look wonderful, how about yours? I’m still chuckling at my comment at the doc’s office to sign the papers, just sign the papers! Allan sends his love, you’ve got mine as always.

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